milk + honey

Most of us know how easy it is to put on weight but there are people struggling at gaining weight. Of course eat fattening food while leading a sedentary lifestyle is not the way to go. How to gain weight quickly in a healthy and easy way then? The answer is really simple: Do 20 deep squats a day and have a cup of milk with honey at night, preferably around 10pm.

For people who wants to loose weight, don’t have milk and honey after 8pm at night.

 

I’m very diligent in my work and all matters that involve people other than myself. I’ll make plenty of notes, plan & schedule and make a thorough check list to ensure everything is done properly in a timely manner. I always made sure that my employers, clients and friends are happy with what I’ve done for them. In summery, I’m a total yes (wo)man and people pleaser.

But when it comes to my personal matters, I’m very absentminded. I leave my shopping bags behind in the shops after paying very often. I’ve forgotten to bring my house keys with me a few times and had to call locksmiths (each costs $200+ per call out) to open my door for me. One time, I left my wallet in the post office after posting a parcel. Though the wallet was recovered later, all the cash in it was gone. It happened I had a few hundreds in my wallet that day. The other time, I withdrew $1000 cash from the ATM and left the machine without taking my cash. Ok, enough embarrassing examples – you get the drift. My personal life can be a little very messy. I’m not a forgetful person, my memory is rather good, but my mind is too preoccupied with something else.

 Stop Being AbsentmindedAs I’ve never paid enough attention to this problem and suffered plenty from the consequences, learn to stop being absent minded has becoming increasingly important. Why can’t I apply the same degree of diligence to my personal life? It’s time for a change. In this week’s self motivation instalment, I’m sharing my 7 steps of stop being absentminded:

Make daily, weekly, monthly and yearly To Do List & Checklist for personal matters 

To do list and check list don’t only belong to your workplace. They help immensely with your personal life too! Write down everything you need to do as soon as you think of them. Schedule them in your diary. Follow through your to do list to get things done according to your schedule.

Stop aimlessly daydreaming

Some people are born focused and driven, some people are born daydreamers. I’m definitely the latter. It’s good to have a dream then take actions to achieve your dream. But daydreaming without a purpose is purely a waste of time and huge distraction to your everyday life. Be careful not to daydream while you are doing things like reading, driving or listening to others during a casual conversation.

Always focus on what you are doing

Give 100% attention to your task on hand. If you are dealing with an important task that has a tight deadline, don’t allow yourself to be distracted until you finish what’s needed to be done. Switch off your phone (at least put it on silent mode). Do not check or reply emails. Don’t serf on the internet. Shut your door or put a “do not disturb” sign if necessary.

Double check if you’ve got everything you need before going out

I have a list of 4 essential things I need to bring every time I leave home: House key, phone, wallet and glasses. Also make sure to bring things you need for your particular agenda for that trip.

Take a minute to check your belongings before leaving a place, taxi or plane

Do not leave your shopping bags at the check out after paying for them or your cash at the ATM like I do. I’ve lost numerous pairs of Ray Ban sunglasses because of my absentmindedness. Buying $5 sunglasses so I can’t lose them freely is not a proper solution. The right way is to stop being absent minded and be present.

Have a fixed spot for everything and always put things back to where they should be.

Do you sometimes forget where you put your keys and phone? Do you spend a lot of time looking for things? Always leave your bags, keys etc at the same place. Make it a a habit of yours and keep it forever.

Always be mindful of your absentmindedness and learn to control your mind.

Check in with yourself regularly: are you pay attention to what is happening right now? As soon as you notice that you are loosing focus, bring yourself back to what you are doing right now.

Absentmindedness really is a mental condition. Without proper cure, it can affect our daily life severely. The good news is, you can overcome this habit and stop being absentminded. Just keep trying!

 

Is it possible to loose 2kg in just one day? The answer is yes! I didn’t believe it until I did it myself, without the intention of losing weight because all I wanted was to get rid of bloating.

Yes my tummy puffs up easily and regularly. Sometimes it looks like I’m hiding a balloon underneath my long top. That’s why I’m wearing stretchy pants most of the time now since it’ll be difficult to button up my jeans when I suffer from bloating.

Ok, back to the story of how I lost 2kg in one day.

The other day my tummy was again bloating to the full effect. No matter how hard I sucked my stomach in, it still looked like a very pregnant woman in the mirror. The thing is, I really wan’t. So after a long time of suffering from full bloating, I decided to try something to beat it the next day.

The day started with a glass of warm water followed by a cup of coffee. I had smoothie for breakfast. The smoothie was made of half of one big banana, half of one huge avocado, 1 apple with skin, a few almond kernels with skin, 1 heap of table spoon of chia seeds and 2 glasses of milk.

Just as you thought I’m eating healthy all the time…

My mum prepared Chinese buns for lunch which were made of flour with meat and vegetable fillings and she expected me to have at least 10 of those. Usually I could because the buns are delicious. Yes, that’s totally disgraceful. Did I mention that I’m a big eater? You see, big meals are the cause of bloating. So are lots of white flour, and sodium inside the filling. In order to have a smaller portion, I had 1 more glass of water before lunch with a few drops of apple cider vinegar. And ate very slowly. As a result, in stead of eating 10 of those evil buns, I had 5 and some salad, and a small piece of fish. Now as I writing this down, the total portion still looked quite big! Maybe there’s still a lot room for improvement?

For dinner I had salad, and a glass of warm milk with one tea spoon of honey. An hour after dinner, I skipped rope for around 30 minutes. After that, I had a glass of lemon water. The next day when I woke up, my tummy was less bloated and I was 2 kg lighter. What a pleasant my surprise.

So I had a small win with my battle with bloating this time. It’ll be a life long battle to get rid of bloating, hence I’m noting down all the 9 effective ways to get rid of bloating from my research and personal experience:

Get rid of bloating1. Eat smaller portions.

First of all, don’t eat too much at a time. I usually only stop eating after it feels like I’m going to explode. Now it’s time to change that.

2. Eat less carb.

It’s hard for Chinese to eliminate white rice and white flour from their diet completely. However, if bloating problem bothers you, carb consumption needs to be reduced. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a promoter of cutting out carbs completely, because there are so many healthy benefits from eating good carbs.

3. Be prepared for PMS.

That time of the month is unpleasant. Most likely you’ll be even more bloated than usual because your body thinks you are pregnant. You tend to eat more and sleep more before and during that time. Be mindful of those symptoms and stick to smaller food portions any way.

4. Eat fruits with skin on.

Fruit skin contains a lot fibre, therefore it’s really good for digestion. As a result, you’ll have more chance to get rid of bloating by eating fruits with skin on.

5. Drink green tea.

Tea drinker or not, give green tea a go if you suffer from bloating regularly. Green tea is great for general well being and a wonderful aim for digestion.

6. Drink lemon water.

Similarly, lemon water will aim digestion and reduce symptoms of bloating.

7. Avoid food with way too much sodium.

Sodium certainly doesn’t help get rid of bloating. However many of us, me included love the taste of sodium. Consuming too much sodium especially at the the night could cause serious bloating problem.

8. Eat foods that help get rid of bloating.

Here are some examples:

  • Banana
  • Eggs
  • Tomato
  • Salmon
  • Grapefruit
  • Oat meal
  • Brown rice
  • Almond
  • Blue berries
  • Asparagus
  • Steak (lean)
  • Parsley

9. Eat less foods that can cause bloating.

Of course, there are foods that can cause bloating. So consume less of them will help get rid of bloating. Sadly, some of super healthy food made the list.

  • Cabbage
  • Broccoli
  • cauliflower
  • Garlic

As you can see, to key to get rid of bloating is eating right. Get to know your body and look after it. In return, your body will look after you:) Do you suffer from bloating too and how do you get rid of it? I’d love to hear from you!

 

 

 

 

 

My Grandpa died of Colon cancer. I had a long, good cry on the bank of a river thousands miles away, wishing I’d had the chance to see him the last time. Sure, his departure was partly due to old age but Statistics show Colon cancer causes more than 50,000 deaths in the United States alone every year. The American Cancer Society estimates that around 96,830 new cases of colorectal cancer for 2014. In most cases, poor nutrition causes digestive problems, which may eventually result in colon cancer. Thankfully there are ways to keep your colon healthy in natural ways.

How Effective Is Colon Cleansing

The late Princess Diana was one of the first to bring Colonic irrigation to public’s attention. It’s reported she spent thousands of pounds a year on the treatment. Stars like Goldie Hawn and Demi Moore are also said to be fans. Cleansing helps to eliminate harmful toxins and restore balance in the body. For best results, the colonic irrigation therapy should be carried out from a reputable wellness centre like New Jersey Colonic. Medical experts recommend that colon cleanse should be taken at regular intervals to keep the digestive system healthy. It’s likely to experience positive results right after the first session. Regular treatment can help get rid of low energy, arthritis, poor immune system, migraines, acne, acid reflux, and irregular bowl movements. Cleansing can even be tailored to your exact needs. For instance, you can choose to undergo colonic irrigation for weight loss. Some people report eliminating up to a kilo of waste after a colonic treatment.

Colon flushing is a popular process used for eliminating waste materials accumulated in the colon for years. Care must be taken when choosing a therapist. Look for a centre that provides treatment under the guidance of experienced hydro-therapists, and make sure that your chosen wellness centre undergoes colonic hydrotherapy in a safe and hygienic environment.

If the thought of Colonic hydrotherapy sounds too scary to you (and me in this case), there are some doctor-approved, natural ways to improve colon Health.

Natural Ways to Improve colon Health

You can improve your colonic health naturally by growing a healthy food habit. Here are some steps that need to be taken along with the colonic irrigation treatment.

Drink a Lot of Water and Other Fluids

Lack of hydration can cause constipation and hardening of fecal matter in the intestine. This could hamper the natural digestive process. Drink plenty of fluids – at least 10 glasses of water every day. In addition, consider opting for fasting with juice.

Take Fibre-rich Foods

Medical experts recommend around 30 grams of fibre every day. Fibre helps to take out mucus from the intestinal walls quickly. This helps in eliminating hardened waste materials stuck in the wall for years. Some examples of fiber-rich foods include peas, bananas, broccoli, raspberries, prunes, beans, celery, brown rice, and whole-wheat cereals.

Increase Your Intake of Vegetables

Fresh fruits and green vegetables help to extract fecal matter from the lining of the colon. You can also consider taking natural herbs, such as, fennel, senna, cascara sagrada, and garlic.

Stay Physically Active

It is also important to take part in physical activities. Exercising helps to increase blood flow, which eventually stimulates colon cleansing. Depending on your age, you can do morning walk, jogging, or join a gym.

Ensure Regular Bowl Movements

Watch out for any irregularity in bowl movement. If you spot any regularity, consider seeking medical help immediately. Deep breathing when having a bowl movement can help.  Also make sure to chew your foods thoroughly when eating. Another good idea would be to get abdominal massage regularly from an expert.

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pick yourself upHave times been hard lately? Here is a mini guide to picking yourself back up after something knocks you down.

Be kind to yourself

Let’s be honest for a second. There are enough people in the world who have put you down, or will do in the future. This might be somebody with road rage shouting at your at a traffic stop. Or, a total stranger knocking into you in the street and not apologizing. Whatever form this put-down or negativity comes in, it can start to build up. So, don’t add to it with your own harsh words and thoughts. Learn to be kinder to yourself. Not everything can be your fault. You aren’t always the one to blame. Remember these things and ease up on yourself. Tell your reflection in the mirror that you love her once in awhile. Turning negative thoughts into positive thoughts will slowly begin to seep into the rest of your life. A shift in attitude can lift the burden of things like anxiety and depression.

Give yourself some breathing room

You can’t pick yourself up if there is simply too much else still weighing you down. Lighten the load on yourself. Cancel social commitments, explaining to friends that you need some alone time for a while and promising you’ll be back soon. If you usually handle five or six projects at work, ask your boss if you can cut down to just three or four for a while. If you take your kids to a different place each night, look at whether they’re old enough to get public transport on a few of those occasions. Giving yourself some breathing room in all of these areas of your life will make your recovering faster and less painful. You can get back to being a social butterfly, professional multitasker and acrobatic parent soon. Not now.

Ask for help

In this case, it doesn’t matter what has happened to you. What matters is that you learn to ask for help. Despite what those around you may think, you are not superhuman! Every could do with a little support here and there, and you are no exception. So, find help, or ask friends to help you find it! If you have mental health issues, there are specialists out there can pinpoint which form you suffer with. Once this is done, they can prescribe the best treatment. Meanwhile, if you are recovering from something that has already happened, talking it through with a counsellor could be wise.

Get a change of environment

After something bad has happened, we can find ourselves stuck in a rut. Pull yourself out of this rut by finding a new environment to spend some time in. So, it could be that you go and stay with a friend for a few weeks. Or you could book a weekend city break or a week-long beach holiday! A fresh perspective might be just what you need to recharge your batteries and get you back on your feet again.

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Photo credit

If your loved one has a big birthday coming up, then throwing them an unforgettable birthday party could be a great gift for them. There are a number of ‘big’ ages in our lives that we all celebrate, from 21 to 50. The tips in this guide will help you to throw an awesome party, whatever their age!

Send Out Invites Well In Advance

You want plenty of people to turn up to this birthday party, or at least all of the people who matter. Make sure you send out the invites well in advance so that people have time to make arrangements for babysitters and days off work if needed. You can’t complain that nobody has turned up if you haven’t given people enough notice. Chances are that if only a handful of people turn up, your guest of honour may be embarrassed and wish you never threw them a party at all.

Consider Keeping It A Secret

You can always consider keeping the party a secret from the guest of honor, which is sure to make the party unforgettable in the first place, as it’ll be such a surprise! Make sure all of the guests know not to say anything at all, and avoid telling anybody who tends to have loose lips. You want the look on the guest of honor’s face to be that of genuine surprise!

Come Up With A Fun Theme They’ll Like

Having a birthday party theme can make the party so much more fun and exciting. Whether you’re throwing the party for a child or a fully grown person, a theme is always an option. You could make it a free for all fancy dress, or choose a specific theme to run with.

Find The Perfect Venue

Having the right venue is really important for a party. If the party is just going to be close friends and family, then you could potentially hold it at a house. However, for most parties you’ll need to rent or book a room. Some rooms are free with a certain number of guests!

Research Different Caterers For Food

Finding the right caterer means wowing everybody with the food. Everybody knows that food is one of the best parts of any party, so make sure you take your time with this bit. Spit roast catering is really popular and all guests should enjoy a hearty meal. Alternatively you can just serve finger food.

Make Sure It Suits Their Personality And Tastes

Of course you want this party to suit the guest of honor’s personality and tastes down to the ground. They’re not going to want a huge ball thrown in their honor if they don’t like attention on them. Consider them and what they’ll enjoy before anything else.

Hopefully these tips help you to throw a brilliant party for your loved one. You’ll both be able to look back on it forever and have amazing memories! Leave your own tips below, I’d love to hear them!

I’ve been working on keeping my home clean and tidy but when my mind is focused on work or other major issues in life, old messy habits would come back to haunt me. So, I must continue learning how to make keeping a clean home as my second nature.

clean home

Photo: Archer Interiors

Recently, I came across this article: Ten habits of people who always have a clean home. Here are some very useful tips/reminder to stay ahead:

  1. They make their bed every morning
  2. They always put clothes away
  3. They clean as they cook
  4. They empty the dishwasher in the morning
  5. They wipe down surfaces after every use
  6. They do a load of laundry regularly
  7. They put things away where they belong
  8. They don’t procrastinate
  9. They dust and vacuum regularly
  10. They straighten up before bed
Life Skills



We all want our kids to be happy. And we want them to grow up to be happy, healthy and independent adults. There are lots of things we can teach our children over the years. But there are certain life skills that will stand them in good stead, no matter what life throws at them.

7 Essential Life Skills to Pass onto Your Kids

  1. Always Look After Your Health

First and foremost, always look after your health. Take them to visit a paediatric dentist regularly, so they get used to the experience. Make regular appointments to see the doctor and ophthalmologist. Let them learn how important good health is.

  1. Eat Well

Involve your kids in cooking and food decisions. Teach them how to make healthy choices and avoid foods that lead to poor health. Encourage them to help with grocery shopping, food preparation, and baking. If possible, grow food in your garden so they can see the process of planting to plate. If you have a small outdoor area, consider growing herbs or tomato plants indoors.

  1. Communicate

Communication is a vital life skill and will impact on all areas of their lives. It is likely to affect the jobs they get and the relationships they build. Expose them to lots of people from an early age. Encourage them to make friends and help them to navigate these relationships. As well as children, ensure they are comfortable speaking to adults.

  1. Good Manners

Good manners are part of your child’s communication skills. Teach them how to respond to different people and to say please and thank you. Foster a respectful and polite environment where kindness is key.

  1. Problem Solving

To be independent, children need to work out how to solve problems for themselves. A good way to encourage this is when they come to you with a question. For example, if your son or daughter tells you they can find something, don’t just locate it for them. Ask them where it should be and whether they have checked there. Then ask them where else it could be and suggest that they check. This will encourage them to find solutions themselves.

  1. Budgeting

As your children get older, they will need to learn the value of money. Don’t just hand money over if they ask for it. Provide an allowance in return for them completing chores. If there’s something they want, show them how to save up for it. They will appreciate the item far more if they have worked for it.

In later years, teach them how to set up a household budget. Show them how to enter the money coming in and the bills.

Life Skills

  1. Empathy

Empathy is an important life skill, but it is often overlooked. The best way to teach this is to demonstrate it. When a situation arises, ask your children to consider it from the other person’s point of view. Ask them how they think that person feels.

  1. Exercise

Show your child the importance of physical activities. Make activities fun so they want to get involved. Let them see you exercising and explain why you’re doing it.
With all life skills, the best way to teach them is by demonstrating them. There’s no point in telling a child to behave one way and then do something different yourself. For the message to be effective, you need to model those skills.

Top Tips For Improving Your Memory

Everyone wants to have great memory, but not many people know how to achieve it. A lot of people fall under the illusion of believing that memory is a given. People think that you are either born with a good capacity to remember, or you are not. But nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, anyone can have great memory. Even if you feel that you have never had good memory, that doesn’t have to be the case. There are some basic steps you – and anyone – can take to improve your memory. The beauty of the mind is that the more you practice something, the easier it gets. This is true of memory, just as it is with everything else. If you are keen to learn how to improve your memory fast and without drastic changes to your life, then read on. Here are some top tips from proven studies.

Top Tips for Improving Memory

First: Understand It & Know It’s Possible

Memory relies upon various functions within the brain. It’s true that these all need to be working properly in order to enjoy good working memory. However, if these aren’t working, you would probably know it! Memory works in an interesting way. It relies, in part, on a neurotransmitter known as acetylcholine. Choline is converted into acetylcholine, and this helps with cognitive ability, including memory. This is the basic framework, regardless of age or any other factor. So anybody with a functioning brain can learn to improve their memory – and that includes you.

Brain Workouts

The main key to improving your memory is to give your brain a good amount of practise. This doesn’t have to be particularly strenuous. Just a little each day will more than suffice. However, you must ensure that your brain workout has some basic elements if it is to be productive. First, it needs to be challenging – otherwise, your brain won’t workout! It is great to improve your communication skills by trying to connect with different kinds of people or take courses such as a masters in tesol, if you love teaching. Teaching is one of the best ways to keep your brain functioning

It also needs to include something novel, so that your brain learns something new. What’s more, ensure that it is rewarding. This way, you are more likely to do it again in future. Exercises of this nature can boost your memory in the long run.

Physical Exercise

Tips for improving memory

To keep your brain in peak condition, you also need to look after your body. Your memory will not function at its peak unless your body is operating well. So, make some time to get in some decent physical exercise, as well as the brain workouts. A couple of high-intensity sessions a week is more than sufficient. As long as you are looking after your body, your brain will benefit from it. Also ensure that you get a good amount of sleep. That way, your brain is sure to be firing on all cylinders.
With these simple steps, your memory can improve in no time at all. You will find, too, that the more you practise it, the easier it becomes. Start with simple exercises, and gradually build up. If you also keep a memory diary, you will be able to chart your progress. This will encourage you to continue.

It’s common knowledge that we women are more prone to depression than men. The reasons for this are unclear, but more women are diagnosed than men each year.

Right now scientists are investigating what factors lead to depression. They hope that if they understand the causal links, they’ll be able to fight the diseases. They also hope that it will explain why women seem to be at greater risk than men of developed the disease. Here’s what we know so far.

Hormonal Factors

Whenever women have a particular health problem, it seems as if the hormonal factor is trotted out. But now scientists are wondering whether women’s hormones put them at much greater risk. Imaging of the brain shows that people with depression have a different brain structure than those that don’t. Many scientists believe that chemical neurotransmitters affect the structure of the brain. And so it’s not much of a leap of faith to then suggest that hormones do too.

Female hormones can actually affect the brain chemistry that controls mood. And this might be why women experience greater levels of depression during times when their hormones are changing. We see more depression and anxiety during puberty and pregnancy, for example.

There isn’t all that much that can be done about the hormones themselves. But the trick here seems to be to avoid situations during pregnancy and puberty that could exacerbate mental health problems. Of course, that’s easier said than done.

Stress

stress at work

It shouldn’t surprise anyone that stress is a precondition for a bout of depression. Stress changes the way your body responds to stimuli. And prolonged stress can cause its structure to change in ways that hurt, not help.

For women, primary sources of stress involve work and caring for children. A stressful episode at work can quite easily trigger depressive symptoms. So too might the stress of caring for children while in poverty.

One possible solution is to join an online mental health community. Psychiatry articles and personal support can help give perspective. This, in turn, can reduce the propensity to feel depressed or stressed.

Other Disorders

Many women who experience depressive episodes often have other longstanding mental health issues. Depression often coexists with other mental health problems like eating disorders. And eating disorders tend to be a lot more common in women than in men.

Eating disorders aren’t the only potential disorder that can aggravate depression. Obsessive-compulsive disorder is one. Post-traumatic stress disorder is another. Even social phobia can increase chances of depression. Getting a handle on these problems is an important step towards preventing depression. It’s so important to deal with issues before they become entrenched. Hospital clinics and community mental health carers are important sources of help.

But it’s not just psychological problems that can increase the risks of depression. Physical problems can also increase the chances of becoming depressed. And medical problems often take longer to resolve if a person is depressed compared to if they aren’t.

The solution is to deal with both issues simultaneously. Dealing with one will improve the likelihood of recovering from the other.

 

how to throw a house partyFor most of my overseas readers, summer is nearly here, and that means that people are going to be having evening parties. Nights of entertainment arranged by you for your family, your friends, and neighbors. These types of occasions can be great fun as long as you know how to plan them right. If you don’t you could find that your house ends up a mess and you spend way too much money. Meanwhile, all you have to show for the party is a thumping headache and a few dozen empty bottles of wine. But don’t worry. I can show you how to throw an awesome party, avoiding all the issues.

Buying Alcohol

Unless you are actually hiring entertainment, this is going to be the most expensive party of the party planning. Buying the alcohol. You need quite a lot of it because you want to avoid the embarrassment of running out halfway through the night. But, as much as we love throwing these types of parties I’m sure you’ll agree you don’t want to spend a fortune. There’s good news on that front. If you look into buying liquor online, you’ll find you can purchase in bulk at discount prices. You won’t have to worry about plowing through your budget in one, swift purchase. In fact, you’ll have plenty of money to spend on other things.



Getting The Food

If you’re not the best cook in the world you’ve got two options. EIther, you can hire staff to cook it for you, order in or serve something that doesn’t require cooking. Lay out a buffet and that way your guests can choose and select what they want to eat. Anything that does need cooking you can throw in the microwave a for a few minutes. It won’t take a lot of time, and there’ll be plenty for everyone. The best part? Rather than an expensive order or paying for staff, this will be fairly cheap.

Watching The Weather Forecast

The trick to throwing a good house party for the host is to wait until the weather is bright. You might want to make sure your home is ready for guests incase it starts to rain. But you mainly want them to stay outdoors. That way you only have to worry about a garden clean up rather than your entire home. Trust me when I say this is far better. You might not even need to complete the cleanup yourself. You can hire a crew to get the job done for you. Meanwhile, your house remains in pristine condition.

Entertainment

Do yourself a favour and get an extension lead. Set some of your home speaker systems outside and let the music play. Just make sure that you do alert your neighbors what’s going on. The last thing you want is for your party to be shut down for disturbing the peace. This happens to adults just as often as it does to teenagers. The best way to deal with this is to invite everyone. If they’ve been invited, they can’t really complain.

That’s all there is to it. Follow this guide and you’ll have an awesome party in the in the summer, keeping your home intact.

“Don’t laugh so loudly.”
“Don’t talk too much in public.”
“That’s disgraceful to say something like that out loud.”

I could still feel my mum squeezing my hand, giving me warning signals of my inappropriate behavior in public. Being born shy and raised in a conservative family, I used to be the quietest person in the crowd. It became a habit to lower my head whenever there was an opportunity to speak up in front of a group of people.

Got to admit that I don’t possess any natural talent in speaking either. My dad is an engineer. Whilst he knows his machinery well, he’s definitely not a sleek talker. It’s known that when my dad says “window”, he’s actually referring the door. I have a growing fear that I’m becoming more like that if nothing is done to prevent it.

The truth is, it sucks to be shy.
If you don’t have good public speaking skills, you have no hope in career progression.
While it’s always easy to blame the parents (like I did, sorry mum and dad!), we live our own lives, eventually.
So the decision is yours. If you want to become better at something, there are always means to do that. Just start doing.

For years and years, I wanted to be more articulate and a better listener. Never took any action.
Feeling that I started to loose my speaking ability, from the beginning of this year, I finally started to go to our local Toastmasters club. Was chosen to be the Vice President of Membership of our club from July which really helps me to stick to it… Well at least for a year;).

It’s not easy to go to the regular meetings once every two weeks. Most of the times, I don’t feel like it. But hey, you just have to keep pushing it if you want something.

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No way on earth I could or wanted to be a toastmaster (MC) for a larger audience before. But I was offered an opportunity to be the table topics Toastmaster in our division contest and took it up.
It feels amazing to do something you’ve never done before and see yourself that you can actually do it.

21 Public Speaking Tips for Beginners

By no means I’m an expert or good at it, but I’d like to share 21 public speaking tips for people like me who are just starting out to learn.

1. Love your topic.
I guessed if you are reading this post, you might not love public speaking, yet.
So pick a topic you love to start with. Oh it helps. If you love your topic, you’ll love spending time prepare your speech. The more you prepare, the better.

2. Know your audience.
Find out who you are going to present to and where you are going to give the speech. Sun Tzi said in the Art of War: 知己知彼 百战百胜。 -“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.” While your audience and the podium are not your enemies,  it’s good to know your surroundings and who you are dealing with. Preparation is the key.
3. Focus on the positive.
If something goes wrong, focus on the positive side of things. Always.

4. Slow down.
Many people are like me, trying to talk faster. Trust me, talking fast in front of public doesn’t give your audience the impression that you are smart, it gives people the impression that you are nervous. SLOW DOWN. Speak word by word. Pronounce every syllabus.

5. Breathe.
This is an add on to point 4. Slow down and breathe normally. You’ll feel calm and relaxed. I think it is the most important point if you can’t remember anything else.

6. Remember people don’t want you to fail.
Your audience is your friend. We are not referring to political debate here.
Nobody wants you to faint on the stage. If you are extremely nervous and stressed, your audience will feel stressed too. If you are relaxed and enjoying yourself on the stage, your audience will feel relaxed and happy too. There’s no need to be scared of your audiences.

7. Smile.
While it can often be recognized as a sign of weakness in certain social situations, smiling is good for public speaking. Research shows that a  speaker that smiles is perceived to be smarter.

8. Engage eye contact.
There will always be someone friendly in the audience. They will look at you and nod and even smile at you. Look out for those people first. Don’t look at those serious faces and think these people hate you. They don’t hate you.

9. Use hand gestures.
Jazz hands rocks. Yes, true story.

10. Pause.
Of course pause for too long people might think you’ve lost your clue. But pause occasionally will help you to breath normally and amazingly, you’ll look confident too.

11. Bring the energy.
If you love your topic, you’ll bring the positive energy with you. And your audience will love it.

12. Give audience something to take home.
Think for your audience. What’s it in for your audience?

13. Don’t cross legs or clench your fist.
Open up your body and breathe.

14. Use humor.
Lighten up. It’s not all that miserable. It sucks to be boring too.

15. Don’t make excuse or say “sorry”.
If you make a mistake, move on. If you forget about what you want to say next, use note and move on. There’s no need to say that happened because you didn’t have time to prepare well or something else. Generally, the audience don’t care about your excuses. Move on and carry on.

16. Ask questions.
It helps to get the audience involved. It takes the pressure off you for a change. A good way to do it is to ask questions. Not just any questions. Ask easy and fun questions!

17. Wear something makes you feel good.
You don’t want to wear something so tight that makes you uncomfortable or self conscious. It’s not just a girly tip.

18. Be yourself.
No need to pretend to be someone or something that you are not. It’s easier to be yourself. Your audience will accept who you are.

19. No pain, no gain.
If the idea of giving the speech makes you extremely uncomfortable and you want to pull out, just do it any way. Remember? If you want to get better any public speaking, there’s no better way than doing it and doing it often. No pain, No gain. You’ll learn something every time you get up there and do it.

20. It’s not about you.
Is it or is it not about you? I’m envious people who just love the limelight and can talk non-stop publicly. It’s important people who don’t enjoy public speaking to remember, you’ll be much better off if you focus on deliver your message to the audience, instead of worrying about how nervous you are all the time.

21. Rehearse, rehearse, rehearse, rehearse, rehearse.
Enough said.

 

how to Revitalize Your Skin With Quick Results

There are many reasons why skin can look dull and dry. It can be due to stress, bad diet or even dehydration. It can be hard to know what to do to get your skin looking it’s best again. This guide will show you exactly what you need to do to achieve beautiful, revitalized skin, with long lasting results.

How to Revitalize Your Skin With Quick Results:

  1.    Let’s get food smart

Think about it. Are you currently eating a well-balanced diet? It’s easy to forget that what we eat doesn’t just affect our waistlines, but our skin as well. Try swapping sugary treats for pistachio nuts. They are full of Vitamin E and can help protect the skin from UV rays. The skin needs some fat to help it maintain it’s elasticity, which makes it appear more youthful. By choosing lean meats like fish, you are still getting the protein your body needs and keeping your waistline in check. Eating fresh vegetables will aid your skin in producing antioxidants. These will neutralize signs of ageing. Making these changes to your diet will make your skin appear more radiant and you will also feel uplifted.

  1.    Rehydrating

Dry and cracked skin can make us all feel uncomfortable. Applying a little moisturizer throughout the day can help the skin maintain it’s natural hydration.  Another option is to try products that contain vitamins, which promote the production of collagen. It will allow your skin to retain more moisture and seem renewed.

Water is another obvious choice to tackle rehydration. It’s recommended we drink eight glasses a day to maintain a healthy well-being. So put down that coffee and grab a glass of water instead. Your complexion will thank you for it.

  1.    Beauty Sleep

It turns out that Beauty sleep is not a myth after all. A lack of sleep can cause your body to stress, which can cause your skin to have breakouts. These irritations can get worse if you do not allow your skin to heal during sleep. Having a decent amount of sleep each night will allow your skin to repair itself and produce more collagen. Your skin’s hydration levels also rebalance when you sleep.

Remember always to remove your makeup and apply some moisturiser to sensitive skin before you go to bed. This will help to reduce wrinkles and dark circles under your eyes. Try to use a makeup remover with cotton wool, instead of a makeup wipe. This will be kinder to the sensitive skin around your eyes.  Now let’s all wake up with refreshed, beautiful skin.

how to Revitalize Your Skin With Quick ResultsImage Source: Flickr

By following these simple steps, you will begin to notice a change, almost instantly. The key to success is consistency. You need to be committed, but quickly you will begin to notice how much brighter you look. All your extra effort will be so worth it. All it takes is a healthy and varied diet, a good night’s rest and plenty of hydration. It’s as simple as that.

8 Ways To Supercharge Your Life

Hardly any of my friends know that I have a blog – I’m rather secretive in a way.

Those who do know often joking say, when you get famous….

I typically don’t enjoy that kind of comment because I’m not one of those people who want to be famous.

The reason I want to keep this blog is because I want to have this space to record my thoughts, my journey, to make myself accountable.

Sometimes I wonder if anyone else suffers from downward mode swings as much as I do, so writing motivational stuff often is also good for my soul.

The point is, I don’t want to spend my life feeling down. Everyone has the right to reach their full potential. So here it is:

The 8 ways to supercharge your life and reach your full potential:

1. Don’t complain.

Who wants to spend time with negative people that always complain? Unfortunately I used to be one of those people. Luckily enough, I realized that complaining is not productive. It doesn’t help anything but putting yourself and other people down.

Lighten up, look at the brighter side. There is ALWAYS a brighter side.

2. No more excuses.

Have you heard “Nobody will be impressed with your excuses?” What’s the point of making them. It’s not cool.

If you really want something, try the hardest you can to get it. That’s the only way I know about how to get what you want.

3. Stay focused.

We all have equal amount of time in each day. Some people achieve so much while others sleep walk through their lives. The thing is, most people have very similar intellectual levels, it’s just that focused people are more successful in the long run.

8 Ways To Supercharge Your Life

Sydney Botany Bay

4. Keep reading.

Never stop learning through reading.

You can’t experience everything but you can learn from other people’s experiences. You can learn so much by reading various materials from different sources.

Knowledge is gained by daily accumulation.

Read up.

5. Ditch procrastination.

We humans are good at procrastinating. It’s often much easier to up with some ideas and wait than to take action.  I find the best way to fight procrastination is to write a to do list and cross them off once you finish the task. I have no patience to wait so it’s often easier for me to take action if I write down my list of things to do.

Be decisive and take action NOW.

6. Stop regretting.

There are no regret pills for you to take. If something has been done, MOVE ON. Don’t waste your precious time thinking about it over and over.

7. Never give up.

If you really want to achieve something, never give up trying. The end result might not be as splendid as you have hoped but it would still be a lot better if you’ve tried everything you can than not trying or giving up too early.

8. Conquer fears.

Everyone has fearful moments. The difference is how you deal with your fear. Never run away from fears.

You’ll make mistakes; other people will laugh at you.Deal with it. It’s all part of life.

In return, you’ll learn from your mistakes and be a much stronger person.

How To Get Rid Of Negative Emotions

How to get rid of negative emotions? Have you ever been bothered by your own negative thoughts? Do you find it’s hard to stay positive and productive all the time? We human beings all have emotions; some are more emotional than others. Unfortunately I often suffer from huge mood swings. Though most of my ex-colleges commented I’m “calm and collected”, deep down I know how moody I could be. A few years ago J murmured “maybe you have bipolar“. Maybe he’s right, I just don’t want to get it diagnosed by a doctor.

The good news is sometimes people do not only grow older, they grow better too. I’m on the path of growing better. Trust me, most of the times you are the best doctor of  yourself. I’ve just finished my 30 Day Trial: Be Less Emotional and found some effective ways to control negative emotions such as depression, anger and anxiety.

How To Get Rid Of Negative Emotions

Photo source: Internet

What worked for me:

How to get rid of negative emotions:

1. Acknowledge your feeling and deal with it.

When you experience the negative feelings, instead of trying to ignore them. Stop for a moment and acknowledge your feelings. If you are feeling not happy, ask yourself why?

If there’s no particular reason to feel unhappy, it is just your normal habit of feeling unhappy all the time, lighten up. Think of something that makes you happy. If you can’t think of anything, think hard, there will be something that makes you happy. Once you find that positive thought, stay with it for a while.

If you are feeling anxious about something, ask yourself why you are anxious. Is there anything that you can do to reduce the anxiety? Once you’ve found that something you can do, do it. Now.

If you are feeling angry, stop and reflect your anger. Are you angry about yourself? Did someone or something make you angry? Does being angry help with the situation? Very often, the answer is no. So tell yourself, being angry only does harm to the situation and your health.

2. Take a deep (or a few) breath(s).

When you suffer from negative thoughts, take a deep breath first, then a few more. Concentrate on your breaths. Try to count your breath. This will help you to take your mind off your negative thoughts. Deep breath helps with stress relief.

If you are in a situation facing an angry and unreasonable person who’s barking at you, I understand you’ll feel angry because of it.

3. Establish positive thoughts in the morning.

I believe being happy is a habit that can be developed. In this blog post Be Greatful, I started to train myself to have positive thoughts first thing in the morning. Make the start of your day pleasant.

4. Have a good night sleep.

A good night sleep very often sets you off in a good mood. Unfortunately, getting a good night sleep is not that easy for a lot of people.

Some times people have sleep disorders, some times people can’t sleep well because they have little babies to look after. I could sleep long hours but the quality of my sleep is not that great. All sorts of dreams, well mainly unpleasant ones fill in my sleeping hours. So I could still feel tired and irritated after a long night “sleep”. One way I find that can help with this problem is to soak feet in hot water before going to bed. Yes, like J said, like an old woman:). Haha…Whatever!

5. Stop once in a while and smile to yourself.

Learn to like yourself and appreciate yourself more!

6. Tick off more of the easier tasks on your to do list.

When are feeling negative, it’s hard to get yourself to do things and be productive. The truth is, the more unproductive you are, the more unhappy you become. How to break this vicious circle? Do more. How? Tackle the easy tasks first.




7. Listen to inspiring audio books.

Don’t completely shut down when you feel depressed. It’s ok when you don’t feel like facing the world and talk to other people. But you are strong enough to drag yourself out of depression. Have some motivation/inspiring audio books ready. They can be good anti depressant when you are feeling down.

8. Listen to loud, upbeat music.

Different people would have different choices. I like Michael Jackson’s “Beat It” and “Billie Jean”.

9. Stay in the sun.

Sun makes you happy. If when you feel sluggish and it’s sunny outside, go out. Stay in the sun and take a deep breath. Stretch your arms out and upwards… feeling better?

10. Move your body vigorously.

When you feel slightly depressed, move your body before it develops into deep depression that totally takes control over you.

Make a move, no matter how reluctant you feel. Try sprint, jump up and down or dance like crazy.

Life is too good to be wasted feeling unhappy all the time. Yes, it’s always easier to feel sorry for yourself and find excuses to let negative emotions control you. But you, my friend, you are the one who controls you and your life. Do waste the precious gift of life. You can do it. You can get better.

The trick is: try to be a little harder on yourself. Don’t give in when the negative emotions start to attack you. As long as you are willing to make efforts to change, slowly and surely, you will become better at control your emotions.